His Ridiculous Ego

. . .Such a Huge Ego

"The male ego, with few exceptions, is elephantine [very large] to start with" -Bette Davis

If there is anything that I can't stand, it's the male ego. What Beyonce should have said was "It's big, It's too wide, It's too strong, It won't fit. . . but seriously. . . It's ridiculous."

I mean, no one wants to go for the guy with low self-esteem necessarily, but the guy with the ego is so repulsively "Man," that at times it's hard to understand him. In addition, this "macho man" was the guy with low self-esteem about ten years earlier, who learned the gift of gab and talked himself into looking better.

Honestly, I just don't get it. I have a million male friends and counting, two brothers, several uncles and have had countless on-going discussions about men. . . and I still don't get it. Why do they speak in such a different language?

The other day I had a heated discussion with one of my friends and as he explained his point, as frustrating as it was, I listened. I listened hard. Yet, you know how much I understood, nothing at all. Then it clicked, an epiphany of some sort. I was transported back to my general psychology class while in pursuit of my bachelor's in psychology and remembered the ego. It was that creeper, Freud, who always talked about the id, the ego, and the superego. These were parts of a person that controlled how one dealt with situations, perceived life and handled others. Out of this spawned my thoughts on the male ego. This ridiculous ego, that spouts his nasty head when a man feels challenged or as if he is not in his most dominant position.

The other day my mother was telling me that my dog snapped at my little sister. She seemed to be concerned, so later that night, I got on my "crack"berry and did some pretty intense research on aggression in dogs. My dog has never bit anyone before, but I just wanted to make sure it wasn't something that could happen. To my surprise and to some of which I already knew, I found an article that talked about dog pack mentality. The author discussed the mentality that dogs have, as well as how domesticated dog's achieve pack placement. Apparently, dogs use aggression to find their place in a new pack and once that place is found. They will fight to keep it.

Sound familiar?

I'm not going to draw any conclusion for you, just giving a little information so that you can let your vibrant, little mind take flight; but I ended up having to explain to my friend that he is a man, with an ego, and I am a woman that has no idea why he feels the way he does. By no means am I saying that women don't have egos, just to appease the men, but What I'm saying is that men are socialized in a different way, than women. Men grow up in a war zone of toughness, desensitized emotions, and "Say it wit yo chest" training, while women are generally trained to communicate, cry it out, love, and to always have compassion. This is not in every culture, nor is it in every man and women that I have come across, just my personal experience.

I understand that because of some of these barriers, I don't understand why men puff up in the company of other men, or even why they have the need to declare that they are a man from time to time. Regardless, it just is what it is. I'm just saying, sometimes it gets a little ridiculous.

Just saying.