"Friendship is like an expensive china. It can be fixed when it is broken, but the crack will remain."Ehhh. . . This quote could go either way. In some cases, this is true and in others, relationships can be strengthened by a little hot water and polishing. I guess the trick here is to be able to decipher between what is broken and what can be repaired. In my experience, it all depends on how badly both individuals want the relationship.
I would consider a relationship broken when one person no long wants the relationship. In this case, I would argue that the crack will remain because there is usually some residual negative feeling when some one tries to completely get rid of it, but this too, is debatable.
Growing up and learning how relationships have their ups and downs, or ebbs and flows so-to-speak; I've learned that my longest lasting relationship have been either: an act of God, an act of one's party's extreme dedication, or an act of mutual understanding.
For my act of God relationships, I feel that those people were destined to be forever and for whatever reason. . .It just works. When I met them, we clicked. When we talk, it works. It just seems to be this over-all effortless thing that means a lot to me. It never seems to matter how much time goes in between speaking, or how much effort goes into the relationship; It just works.
For my act of one's party's extreme dedication, I feel that these people in my life at some point fought really hard to be there. I'm not the most emotional person and in a few cases, individuals had to spend a long time putting into the relationship until it finally clicked to me that they were someone that I could hold on to. I think these are the relationships that I try to work hardest at because I have so much slack to catch up on.
My last seemingly indestructible relationship type is an act of mutual understanding. This is the type of relationship that all of the previous ones have, it just encompasses more than the deepest levels of friendship. These are the people that just know where we stand. Some of these people are movie buddies, hang-out buddies, school buddies, etc, all the way up to my Best Friends. It's just that understanding that this is your place and my life (Whatever that place is) and we both know that nothing is going to change that.
In the cases where none of these apply, it's always difficult to evaluate because depending on where you are in life, you need people for different things. There are times when we need a lot of support, and other times when we need none at all. This is where communication comes in.
Sometimes cutting ties is a natural process and sometimes it happens prematurely but at the end of the day it happens. When a relationship comes to the point where it's no longer beneficial to you, I encourage you to really think about the other person before making the final dissection. You should ask yourself, if the relationship is beneficial to both parties, just you, or the other person?
If you find that you are no longer receiving the benefits, you may want to consider how much of a friend you really want to be to someone. Relationships are not always about YOU. You should never just cut ties because the relationship is shifting to where you are no longer the primary focus, because in some cases, that person may not be in a position to give. In my best friend and I's case, we take turns. At the end of the day, what goes around comes around. . . and that can work for you or against you.
Lastly, when you make the decision for all the right reasons. No one can blame you for that. Not everyone holds a permanent position in your life. Spring cleaning allows room for new relationships and new experiences.
Cut Wisely :)
Think.Happy.Thoughts
*Likes*
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