Resentment = Poison ≠ My Story

"Resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die" - Carrie Fisher

I wish I could believe you then I'll be alright

But now everything you told me really don't apply

To the way I feel inside

Loving you was easy once upon a time

But now my suspicions of you have multiplied

And it's all because you lied

[Chorus:]

I only give you a hard time

'Cause I can't go on and pretend like

I haven't tried to forget this

But I'm much too full of resentment

Just can't seem to get over the way you hurt me

Don't know how you gave another who didn't mean a thing, no

The very thing you gave to me

I thought I could forgive you and I know you've changed

As much as I wanna trust you I know it ain't the same

And it's all because you lied

[Chorus:]

I only give you a hard time

'Cause I can't go on and pretend like

I haven't tried to forget this

But I'm much too full of resentment

I may never understand why

I'm doing the best that I can and I

I tried and I tried to forget this

I'm much too full of resentment

I'll always remember feeling like I was no good

Like I couldn't do it for you like your mistress could

And it's all because you lied

[Bridge:]

Loved you more than ever

More than my own life

The best part of me I gave you

It was sacrificed

And it's all because you lied

[Chorus:]

I only give you a hard time

'Cause I can't go on and pretend like

I tried and I tried to forget this

But I'm too damn full of resentment

I know she was attractive but I was here first

Been ridin' with you for six years why did I deserve

To be treated this way by you, you

I know your probably thinking what's up with Bee

I been crying for too long what did you do to me

I used to be so strong but now you took my soul

I'm crying cant stop crying cant stop crying

You could of told me that you wasn't happy

I know you didn't wanna hurt me

But look what you done-done to me now

I gotta look at her in her eyes and see she's had half of me

How could you lie

Resentment by Beyonce

♥♥♥

This song hits my soul so strongly right now, but it makes me wonder. . . at one point do you say goodbye to the hurt? I feel like I've been holding on to pain, distrust, fear, hurt, and hate for so long I almost lost my ability to love. I no longer want to willingly take the poison that makes what has really happened last longer than it should. Everything happens for a reason. God help mend my heart. . .Let, this be my step towards healing.

I no longer want to be filled with resentment. I don't want to feel like their is something wrong with me because I trusted someone to keep my best interest at heart and they didn't. I don't believe I was perfect but God knows my heart. I don't want to spend the rest of my life waiting for the apology that will never come. I don't want to think about how things could have been if . . . I just want my heart to be free from this cage that it's in. So I relinquish hurt and pray for redemption. I forgive you means I don't charge it to your heart, I just can't forget what you did. . . and that's okay.

Don't give anyone the power to steal your peace, love, or joy. Those are three of the most valuable gifts God gave you. Let go of the resentment. Hold on to peace. Things will work out in your favor. :)

Think.Happy.Thoughts ;)