Try Sleeping With A Broken Heart

Have you ever tried sleeping with a broken heart?

I can't really get down with every thing that Alicia Keys says or does but her song 'Try Sleeping With A Broken Heart' has been a song that has graced the essence of heartbreak like no other. If you don't believe me, watch this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=srMBZiqNMaM

Over the past year, Alicia has moved from an amazing songtrist to somewhat of an amazing, home wrecking, songstrist, but just listening to the lyrics of this song, you can't help but wonder what she went through to capture the raw emotions of heartbreak. There are a million songs about love and love lost but not everyone deals with it the same. Some people cry, others shut down, while others get angry. There is no telling what a person will do when they deal with that unreachable pain of losing the one they loved.

Just recently, I was sitting in my living room, on the computer and it struck me: I, too, am suffering from a broken heart. I, too, have been sleeping, living, breathing in pain and have been asking others to feel the pain that I had yet to acknowledge was there. Just trying to find a way to feel some relief, without having to really deal with the pain. Deep, right? I know.

One of the hardest parts of acknowledging that something is over is when you say things like, "I'll always be in love with you." I like that Alicia adds this to the lyrics because I've heard this a thousand times. This is the thing that holds our hearts captive, yet sets us free.

An idea that the power of emotions that you feel for a person will last well past their existence in your life, can be a motivator or distraction. It can mean, "I can't move on because I will always love you" or "I can move on because I know that my feelings for you will never change."

The best part of the song is that she says,"Tonight, I'm going to find a way to make it with out you." She is taking a proactive stance with her heart. Proclaiming that regardless of the difficulty, she will go on without this person. This, for me, is one of the hardest parts. I imagine that once you have came to the conclusion that you will love someone forever, making the decision to move forward without them is like leaving a dying soldier on the battlefield amidst war. It's not an easy choice to say the least.

As much as you would like to take them with you, you risk your life staying in that place with them for longer than is healthy for you to stay. At the very center of it, it's the decision to choose life for yourself, when there is no longer life in a situation.

For me, this can be my most self-destructive time. Usually this is when people eat, sleep, stay indoors, find a rebound or anything to ease the pain of loosing someone they love. It always takes me a while to accept that longest and hardest way is the most beneficial in the end. Taking it one day at a time and dealing with those raw emotions.

"Anyone could have told you from the start it was going to fall apart," is one of the parts of the relationship that we never admit to. Most times, I know when a relationship is going to end, either in the beginning or somewhere thereafter. This only intensifies heartbreak. During the relationship, you have to make a conscious effort to stick through something you and everyone else knows isn't going to work and then eventually watch it fail. Dealing with that causes you to put more blame on yourself than any one or any thing else because you knew it wouldn't work. In essence, you feel like you did it to yourself.

At the end of listening to the song, I felt better that I wasn't truly alone in my bed. There were others working through these same emotions and falling in love again in their own respective corners of the world, and I would as well. It's encouraging that there is love after love lost. As much as it feels like it would have been better to have never loved at all, that same love that we hurt from is the power that drives us to love again.

"There are those among us, that are blessed with the power to save what is loved by another, but powerless to use this blessing for love themselves."